Friday, June 11, 2010

An Oed to the Life of a US Developer

Exerpt from a random email between business partners:

"OK, so after a really epicurean, long belated dinner, complete with 4 johnny blacks on the the rocks shaken over ice, gin and tonic, and bourbon with lime soda, it occurs to me.


Instead of designing software under the assumption that the people using it are sober and logical, I should assume the worst of the average user.

Namely, they’re drunk and pounding fingers on their iPods expecting shit to work as if, in their unrealistic, dysfunctional irrational dreams, the world was as simple as their puny brains could comprehend.

When you’re not sane (as most of our issues from MSA come in) as such (re. this morning’s inexplicable use of irrationality), I guess it’s only fair to absorb the force major that our current client base suggests and just plain give up.

Human kind is a moronic reduction of an evolutionary cluster fuck. A diarrhea of a convergence between implicit complexity and desirable simplicity.

I’m done now, mostly because I need sleep like the dead do, anyway. Call me tomorrow…if you dare. I’ll be coding the evaluations functionality.

Good luck to me."